I’m only OCD when I have to be!
For anyone that doesn’t know me, I can be a tiny bit OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) about germs. It’s a weird “ability” to constantly think about bacteria, filth and germs! I am writing this blog for a few reasons. For one its like public therapy! I’m doing this to show the world that messes happen and family homes meant to be lived in! I am writing it for everyone who feels the same way I do. A sense of humor does a LONG WAY!!
Looking at me, I think I hide it pretty well. I mean I’m only OCD when I have to be… like when I go to a party and someone sticks there entire hand in the bowl of Cheetos and then I watch them lick there fingers and go in for more!!…deep breath…LOL
I hate when I get french fries from McDonalds at the drive thru and I open the bag and there are ketchup packets all over my fries! To some people no big deal, but to me I see the steps it took to get those packets there!… The ketchup packets were put there by the same person I just handed my DIRTY money too! Did he wash his hands before touching those packets and tossing them in my bag? No! The packets are now DIRTY from all the filthy cash and debit cards he’s been touching all day and from all the grease covered cash register buttons he’s been pushing…and now it’s all just chill’n on my fries…deep breath…
These are the sort of thoughts that run through my brain all day. Most of the time I find it odd that no one notices these things?… or maybe its that no one really talks about it? I spend more time thinking about germs and illness than anyone else I know! Part of my germy fear is a need for control, but the irony is that OCD is really it’s controlling me?! (awkward laugh) The other part of my obsession was brought on by PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) from being in the Army. But I don’t let my “special attention to dirt” define me and I don’t hide it from anyone either! It’s who I am!
I’m the girl that gets Purell for her birthday and couldn’t be happier!!!! I must admit looking back at the things I’ve feared and things I’ve done in the past are now quite hilarious!! My need to feel in control of my thoughts often comes out in the form of cleaning! I take it out on my house. I organize, scrub, rearrange, straighten, and bleach. I’m so meticulous that not even a thread is out of place. I am standing up to my compulsions and doing it in a way that makes fun of them!!
I am going to be spending my free time looking for the dirty places and photographing them…sure I’ll clean them after I find them but that’s not the point! LOL….baby steps
Take my favorite show, “Friends” everyone just walks into each-others apartments unannounced and sit down at there kitchen table and start a conversation. I WOULD FREAK OUT!!! Every-time I see shows like that I wonder how they put up with that?! I need some advance notice! I need time to make sure I at least have some clean coffee cups before you come over!!
So I posted some pictures of my house when it’s clean just to show the world that I am not always a mess!! LOL I hope you enjoy my blog and look forward to hearing from you!!
Hide and Seek 
You’re so SILLY, but it’s cute to read! The ketchup packet thing has me going though-I must admit, and it’s weirding me out a bit! LOL.
Everytime you post a pic of your house, I’m impressed. You have a good thing going for you over there and your home looks FAB-U-LOUS! Thanks for sharing all of your more “normal” pics too-makes me feel better about the days I don’t have the time to be “Martha Stewart.”
Amber, I can actually say with 100% certainty that I now know how you feel. Going through treatment that kills your immune system has forced me to look at all of those things. In fact I can’t eat at any kind of deli, fast food, buffet, or anywhere that food sits out and gets handled by multiple people. In fact my mom, sis, and I went to a brand newly opened place today, super clean, and I’m clorox wiping the table, Silvewear, salt and pepper, ketchup…you get my point! Lol. I have been involuntarily become a germaphobe. It is a trip, I had a full blown panic attack on a bus one day, won’t be doing that again. Anyway, my point is, there is a fine line between sanitary, and obsessive, and I hope this blog helps you find your line :) I love you for trying to increase your enjoyment of life by controlling only the things you can. The rest doesn’t matter!